Archives for November 2012

A Good Day

A Good Day

Had a good day. Got a new battery for my car, got to work on time, put in my hours, went out to dinner with my Momz then helped her put up her Christmas Tree. Then I got some fixings for meatloaf, which I’ll make for dinner tomorrow night. Should be yummy.

It’s nice to see a smile like that on my Mom’s face.

The margaritas helped, for sure.

Last year Edmund won a prize for being the best bowler at his office Christmas party. It was a $50 gift card to Chili’s (one of my favorites). Shortly after he got it, he lost the card.

Fast forward to this past weekend: what was lost was now found! Yay!

I invited Mom to go with me to Chili’s for dinner tonight, courtesy of Edmund’s sweet bowling talent. And we had a blast.

We got the dinner for 2, not the chintzy $20 meal with the appetizer and two entrees, we went all out and got the $35 meal which also included a dessert and TWO margaritas. Which meant that Mom had two margaritas. Because I don’t like them. (And I was driving.)

It was my suggestion, one that my Mom was fully on board with.

After the dinner we went back to my Mom’s place and did this:

Yup. It was a good day.

Fried

So crispy tonight.

So very crispy.

I’m done.

Squee

Squee

Luke and Will Lounged with LannaLee and got a couch!

Luke and Will Lounged with LannaLee and got a couch! [Look for the episode on December 13th!]

Sigh. Talked to fellow Piscataquis County natives Luke and Will Mallett tonight for Lounging with LannaLee. Aren’t they dreamy?

Bonafide Rockers! Well, Northwoods Country Rock and Rollers. Gracious with their time, we talked for around 50 minutes. Legit musicians who tour and stuff. I bet they have groupies (who am I kidding, look at them, they MUST HAVE groupies!) Oh, and Will was Cosmopolitan Magazine Maine’s hottest bachelor for 2011. (I didn’t ask him about it. Missed opportunity.)

Sorry ladies, they are both in relationships. I checked. [Shaddup.]

Their band is kickass. They’re working on their third album, which will be out next year sometime, so keep an eye out for it. [Included a couple of their videos below so you can see what I mean.]

In other news, a bunch of people at work went in on some (70) Powerball tickets, so now, with the 5 chances I bought yesterday, I have a total of 75 chances to win. C’mon BIG MONEY!

Powerball

My DadI bought five Powerball tickets today.

C’mon big money!

I made a point to buy Powerball tickets today. Because of the big jackpot, naturally, but also for another compelling reason: My Dad would’ve bought a ticket.

Dad loved the lottery and scratch tickets. Because of the chance of winning. He did not over-indulge, mind you, he kept himself to a budget.

PowerballOn his birthday and Father’s Day my brother and I would always get Dad some scratch tickets. Once he got them, he’d start scratching, anxious to see if he were a winner. To the exclusion of everyone else. I felt it was money well spent, a great gift for a man who had most everything he needed.

So, in honor of my father, I bought some damn Powerball tickets.

[C’mon Big Money!]

Monday Monday

I’ve written a poem since my last post and started another (I should be working more quickly, eh?)

I worked today. It was fine.

It’s a Monday.

I didn’t wake up feeling happy. But let me tell you this, I NEVER wake up happy because I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON! So there! It has nothing to do with my cheerful depression. I am just not a morning person. Especially at six o clock in the morning.

I watched/listened to a TED Talk today that gave ways we can determine if someone is lying to us. And one of the things, the tells, is “formal language”, like not using contractions when you speak. Which means that I might just be a LYING LIAR because I did not contract a couple of things in the last paragraph.

So there.

Also: someone (not me) bought inferior batteries and they suck. I am on the second battery in two weeks for my mouse and it’s ALREADY failing. Le sigh. [This is the passive aggressive paragraph.]

Off to do more scheming.

Bear With Me

I’m working on it.

It has occurred to me that I am not always being the person I want to be.

The person I want to be does all the things she says she’ll do – and if she can’t, she takes responsibility for not doing them. Like by saying, I can’t do that. I said I’d plan a retreat in October – obviously it didn’t work out. I still haven’t emailed to apologize or tell her what’s going on.

The person I want to be communicates effectively. And timely. If someone contacts her, she contacts them back. Within a specific frame time. A week max. Maybe. A friend, a close friend, mind you, sent me an email shortly after Dad died expressing his condolences. I still haven’t emailed him back. Another friend sent me a Facebook message last week asking me a question. I haven’t replied yet. Another friend, who I’ve been out-of-touch with (mainly because she is NOT on social media), as far as I know, doesn’t know Dad died because I haven’t emailed her.

The person I want to be is decisive and on top of things. I’m scheduling another Lounging with LannaLee Salon night, and I’ve dropped the ball (again). I need to schedule more interviews, and I can’t seem to get myself to the computer to just ASK people. I need to make a bunch of things for my indiegogo campaign, and instead I spent two days watching many, many episodes of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Edmund and I, in our Bureau of Awesome podcast, talked about being cheerfully depressed. The thing is, I am. I mean, I’m doing well considering the year we’ve had, but sometimes I’m only hanging on by a thread. As I discussed with Patsy Terrell in the most recent Lounging with LannaLee episode, it’s all about getting through each day. Patsy mentioned that she did not journal for a year after her Mom died because she knew she would “lose it”. I feel like, in some ways, I’m avoiding some things for similar reasons. Or when things get harder, I retreat. It’s tougher to push through.

I have a tendency for procrastination. Always have had. Motivated by deadlines, I was always able to keep up with things. Lately it’s been harder to do so. At work (my day job) I am doing okay – except that I haven’t handed in a time sheet since this summer. On my myriad of projects I feel like I have some ideas and then I fizzle out. I want to be doing more. Ideally, I’ve already sent out the indiegogo perks (digital and physical), I’ve But then I spend two days watching Buffy. And there you go.

Granted, I might be being too hard on myself. I’ve published a new Lounging with LannaLee episode every week since March – through Dad’s illness, death, and the aftermath. I’ve blagged (blogged) here every day since late October 2011, through the worst of what 2012 has given me. With my co-worker’s help, I’ve been able to keep up at my job.

Here is my baggage: I don’t want to keep using the “grief” excuse. Is it an excuse? I know it gets old. I also know that there is no real timeline for grief. It unfolds as it will. It sucks, then gets better, then sucks all over again. I’ll keep trying to be the person I want to be, while remembering that nobody is perfect.

Whew. Now that that’s off my chest, I’m going to write some poems for the indiegogo campaign. 15 of them.

It’s a start.

Okay I might be obsessed.

I watched a lot more Buffy today. But, I was starting to feel like a schlub. So I started doing the dishes. AND watching Buffy at the same time!

Now I am not feeling so schlubby.

I’ve done all the dishes.

Well. Almost all. I still have some glasses in the sink. My problem: my Fire ran out of juice and so no there is no Buffy for me to watch while washing them.

My choices would be to suck it up, go out and wash dishes without a digital accompaniment OR plug the FIRE in and keep on streaming.

Leaning toward plugging the Fire in.

I don’t have a problem.

I can quit at any time.

———————-
Question: Should I watch the entire Buffy before I start watching Angel? Or should I, now that I’m on the 4th season, start Watching Angel too?

All the time Buffy

Been watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer all fricking day. Been awesome.

Ate turkey sandwich leftovers, and pumpkin pie.

A good, lazy day.

Day of Thanks

Day of Thanks

Mom and Dad, Thanksgiving 2005

Mom and Dad, Thanksgiving 2005

Although we deeply missed the presence of my Dad, we had a great day. For that we are thankful.

Today I hung out with my Mom and watched as she effortlessly put together a tasty meal for the four of us. It was a smaller meal than we are used to, because we only had 4 of us, but still it was abundant. Turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, squash, mixed veggies, rolls, sweet potatoes, Mother’s fruit salad, cranberry sauce, plus three pies for dessert: needless to say, we had plenty to eat!

Normally we have more people. Edmund’s parents, for obvious reasons, were not able to make it. Dot Mithee and Cousin Benny passed in the last year or so. With Dad’s passing, that’s 5 people missing from the regular Thanksgiving dinner.

Regardless, we had a day of fun, love and togetherness. I went over to Mom’s at around 11 am and hung out. My brother arrived a little after noon. Edmund had to work, so we ate dinner when he got out after 6 pm.

While I am grateful for many things, I am most grateful of the knowledge that my father would have wanted us to have a great day. So by doing so, we were honoring his wishes.

Here are some pictures from our day. I hope, at the least, your day was as good.



Lounging with @PatsyTerrell

Lounging with @PatsyTerrell

Patsy Lounges with LannaLee and gets a couch!Because of the holiday, this week’s Lounge is out early: and it’s a beaut! An hour-long conversation with Patsy Terrell. Our conversation runs the gamut, from Southern Women, public relations, nutburgers, male vs. female styles of communication, to being happy.

Here is the magic in the episode: after I asked her the 10 questions we got off on a tangent. And we kept going. Because when you are talking about choosing to be happy YET dealing with grief (as I am now) there is a bit to talk about. The last half hour we have a mostly cheerful discussion of dealing with a parent’s death; me with my father, Patsy with her mother.

So. Go on over to listen to the episode. It’s a great one.

LannaLee Lounge Lizards!

Yay! Working on Lounging with LannaLee tonight, a new episode is coming up soon. Also: join the mailing list for funstuff.

In fact, here is more information about the Lanna Lee Lounge Lizards:

Be a Lounge Lizard!

Get exclusive Lounging with LannaLee updates plus win fabulous prizes, drawn monthly!

Join now to be entered in the monthly drawing!*


Your information will be kept confidential.

This is the exclusive, FREE Lounging with LannaLee mailing list and community. Support Group! Fun Force! The perfect place for all lovers of Lounging with LannaLee to hear more about what’s coming up!

Lounge Lizard Benefits!

  • Subscription to Mailing list with exclusive reports/content
  • Teasers to Premium Podcasts/Content – [Starting in December 2012]
  • Automatic entry to Monthly Drawing – [First Drawing December 1st, 2012]

Prize Package will include homemade art/crafts, a Lounging with LannaLee Pen, plus other fun stuff. [Still figuring it all out!]

Let’s break that down a little more for you.

  • Subscription to Newsletter with exclusive reports/content: Starting in December there will be an almost weekly newsletter. It will let you know about upcoming shows, and will include exclusive pictures and content
  • Teasers to Premium Podcasts/Content: Once per month Lounge Lizards will have access to Premium Content BEFORE it goes premium. A great way to try before you buy!
  • Automatic entry to Monthly Drawing: every month we will draw one person’s name to receive a prize package from Lounging with LannaLee!

*Each person can win the monthly drawing only once per calendar year.

Still Not Feeling it. Is it a Thankful thing?

Still Not Feeling it. Is it a Thankful thing?

Dad and Dustin eating.

Dad and Dustin eating.

So, still not feeling like blagging. That’s okay. Going to try it anyway.

I’ve been thinking about talking about being Thankful for a while now. It’s a meme of the season: I have several Facebook friends who are giving a thing they feel Thankful about every day. That’s not for me. Not this year.

Don’t get me wrong. I am thankful for many things. My husband. My Mom. My brother. My job. My kitties. My podcast. My Kindle Fire. Doctor Who.

But.

If I think too much on things I’m thankful for, invariably I think of my Dad. And that makes me Sad. I don’t want to be sad anymore.

I suppose it will eventually be a gentle hurt, a kind remembrance. I have good memories of my childhood and my father. I am blessed with a loving family, not perfect, but almost so. For that I am thankful. But to know how lucky I’ve been doesn’t REALLY help. All I can think of is that I wish he were still here.

We are coming up on one of my Dad’s favorite holidays: Thanksgiving. I mean, c’mon, a whole day centering on eating? Dad was in like Flynn. More than that, it was getting together with family. Our small family unit plus any others who wanted to join. Alas, two of our regulars have died in the last year. Cousin Benny Howard passed in October 2011 and Dot Mithee passed in June 2012. Too much change. Too fast.

This Thursday I plan on hanging with my Mom, my brother Bill and Eddie. We will eat up a storm. We will have fun. We might cry a bit; that’s okay too.

Mom, Eddie and I are going to a Comedy show Wednesday night to set the mood. Dad would approve.

——————————————————
I should’ve posted these yesterday. Pictures from our outing to go Curling in Belfast. And a good time was had by all. Pictured are Edmund, Keith, and Keith’s sons.

Not Feeling It

Had a good day. Don’t feel like blagging. So here you go. I’m punking out.

Later.

Buffy

I never watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer. It came at a time in my life when I didn’t have cable. So I never got into it.

But thanks to Amazon Prime I can watch EVERY SINGLE EPISODE on my television (or Kindle Fire).

I like it. It’s a good show.

[I don’t have much else to say. I’ve been watching Buffy all day.]

Soda-tastic

Soda-tastic

Frozen tea-burg soon to meet hotness.This clump of tea-ice is vexing me.

I may have kicked the Coca-Cola habit. I mean, I’ve had some soda after the 30-day soda ban, but no where near the extent I had before the soda ban. Now I make tea to drink at home and at work. At work I freeze it and then add hot tea to that. Very tasty. At home I have a big jug of tea in the fridge. I need to make some more tonight.

Also. I signed up for instagram the other day. Less than a week and I’m hooked. Pretty sad. [I didn’t sign up for it earlier because it was only for iPhones, and I’m on a Droid, and when it became available for the Droid my panties got all up in a bunch because “my” username lannalee was not available. So I took a page out of TheRichBrooks/TheRichBrooks‘ book and called myself thelannalee.]

Morning in KennebunkMorning in Kennebunk with dirty snow.