Checking Out

Checking Out

DadWhat a difference a week makes. A few days, even. It seems like my Dad is checking out. And that kills me.

The week has gone from where we could feel comfortable leaving him alone, to now, where we can’t. He’s more confused. His motor skills are failing. He doesn’t talk to us.

Just another glorious day in suck city.

He’s still eating, tho. Tonight we fed him some Poutine; he scarfed that right up. Then Bill put a bowl of ice cream in front of him. While eating it, Dad dropped a bit of ice cream on the floor. Bill and I watched him put down the ice cream bowl, use the spoon to scoop that ice cream up and put right in his mouth. [“Don’t get no better,” my Dad would’ve said.] Later, Bill put some mini eclairs and cream puffs in front of Dad; they were eaten in seconds.

We also watched as he almost dropped his glass of water, that he was holding by the handle, spilling water all over himself and his bed. We got the bed changed, but he refused to let us (or Bill) help him change his pajamas. Mom was in bed, we forced her to get a good night sleep. I figured wet pajamas wouldn’t kill him.

One of the things Mom has been saying is that she didn’t want to “lose him before I lose him.” And here it’s happening. He’s going away without us. And it’s breaking our hearts.

It is what it is. I hope that we can keep our senses of humor throughout. Find funny things to laugh at. You can’t beat some good gallows humor. So far so good. And if we burst into tears at times, well, that’s part of the journey.

  • Harriman95661

    Well that just broke my heart. Brings back memories of taken care of my dad. Enjoy every second ,every minute,every hour and every day. Thanks for updating us. Love you all <3

  • Dot Mithee

    Wow – what a change. I’d hoped this would happen after the move but it is certainly something that noone has any control of. I am so glad that he has had an opportunty to have so many visitors. I’m also glad that he got to see the house sold, another place puchased, and the move well under way. I pray that you are all able to keep your senses of humor. I believe that is what has sustained you through this. And, you are right, if you burst into tears that’s all right too because it is part of the journey and you need to do that also. I love you all and am praying for you. Give my Sis a great big hug for me.

  • Smmelia78

    Lana, breaks my heart! It is very difficult to watch someone you love dearly fade away right in front of you. I have you guys in my heart and I will be down next week to offer any support that I can. I need Billy’s # if that could be possible. I want to help in the move if I’m needed. Let me know. Love all of you dearly Suzie.

  • Myke Johnson

    Lanna, Ed shared about your dad today at church. I tried to call, but the circuits were busy. Sending love and peace to you all. Please call me anytime!
    Rev. Myke